The following contains excerpts from the resource, Communicating with Diplomacy and Tact (Assessment) (Carnegie Training).
Learning to communicate with others is essential in successful musical and artistic collaboration.
In our music school in Odessa Texas, we hope to help students learn to communicate properly and effectively.
“Communicating with Diplomacy and Tact” is a short book containing an assessment test that can be taken to determine an individual’s ability to tactfully communicate with others.
“Mastering communication skills can improve your professional image and expand your authority. Your ability to navigate through difficult situations, build consensus, and manage change can create powerful results for your organization. Knowing your strengths and weakness can help establish more effective communication with your co-workers and colleagues.”
In our music school in Odessa Texas we hope to help students develop life-skills that will successfully guide them through their life and career.
Following are questions that can help you determine if you have the skills to effectively communicate with your co-workers and colleagues:
Please answer the questions the way you personally would react, not the ‘ideal’ way to react.
- A colleague of yours, in a fun way, gives your boss the impression that you spend too much time on personal business.
- You say nothing to your colleague.
- You tell your colleague that you know he was only kidding but you would appreciate it if he would not do this again.
- You make a point to tell the boss that this colleague left early on Tuesday to play golf.
- A customer tells you how disappointed she is that you did not return the message she left with your assistant. You realize you never got the message.
- You apologize to the customer and say nothing to your assistant.
- You let your assistant save face by telling him you spoke to the client. You understand how the message might have fallen through the cracks given how busy he is.
- You tell your assistant that this is unacceptable and it better not happen again.
- Your manager/supervisor/boss gives you a less than average review that surprises you.
- You go home and vent to family and friends.
- You calmly discuss the review and ask for clarification. You come up with an action plan and incremental review times so you are not caught off-guard again.
- You storm out of the office and tell your colleague how unfair your boss is.
- One of your team members comes to work inappropriately dressed.
- You don’t say anything except behind his back.
- You hold a private conversation with this person and explain the office dress policy for the future, assuring him that you know he did not intend to make a bad impression.
- You tell this person, in front of everyone, that his appearance is unacceptable.
- You are berated in a meeting for being late. The reason you are late is that your carpool ride did not show up on time.
- You take the blame.
- You apologize for the disruption, briefly explain the carpool situation, and commit to re-evaluating whether this is a good idea, particularly on days of important meetings.
- You insist this is not your fault and explain that you are just trying to save gas.
- Your department of 10 people decides to order pizza for lunch and you give the person getting it more than enough money. He does not give you any change.
- You assume it was very expensive pizza and there was no change, or he thought you were treating.
- You ask if he had enough money and if there was any change.
- You accuse this person of trying to rip you off.
We hope to help students in our music school in Odessa Texas to understand the value of positive confrontation, which is 1) To gain a better understanding, 2) To seek a positive change, 3) To establish a growing relationship.
- The company has announced that bonuses will be given out today, and later that day a colleague asks you how much yours was.
- You tell her even though you know you should not.
- You tell her you are uncomfortable sharing this because it is supposed to be kept confidential.
- You tell her that asking this question is very unprofessional.
- You catch a typographical error on a letter that your assistant has prepared for you.
- You ignore it- it’s just a little one and the customer probably won’t notice.
- You bring the mistake to your assistant’s attention and ask her to redo it.
- You tell the assistant that there is no excuse for these types of mistakes.
- A vital member of your team has called in sick on the last day of the week for the past three weeks.
- You don’t say anything and continue to cover for him.
- You hold a private meeting with him, show concern for his pattern, and ask for input on a solution.
- You tell him that this looks very suspicious and he better not do it again.
- A person in your office tells an inappropriate joke in the lunch room.
- You walk away.
- You pull this person aside and tell her that you know she didn’t mean to offend anyone, but she should be more sensitive and professional in such a diverse environment.
- You tell this person, in front of everyone, that this was completely inappropriate.
Add up the numbers from above.
If you scored below 15 on the assessment it indicates that you tend to interact timidly or passively with others. You run little risk of offending anyone, but you tend to have difficulty being honest and conveying your message. You tend to hold things in and complain about situations to non-involved parties. This often builds your sense of frustration which may exhibit itself in less than professional behavior at the wrong times. To improve in this area, consider participating in training to help you build your self-confidence and help you disagree in an agreeable manner. Appreciate that standing up for yourself, when done with good human relations, does not offend others; rather it strengthens your professional relationship with them and allows each of you to achieve positive results.
We seek to help students in our music school in Odessa Texas gain confidence in performance, which also translates into all aspects of life.
If you scored over 22 on the assessment it indicates that you might have a tendency to be aggressive or combative in your communications with others. You are at high risk of offending others. You may have a tendency to lash out at others and place blame on others quickly when things don’t go as you desire. This may be viewed as demeaning by colleagues and cause unnecessary conflict. Appreciate that other people may make unintentional mistakes which can be easily corrected with positive coaching, training, and reinforcement. Rather than becoming argumentative, consider approaching others with calmness and a belief that they can improve.
Although we applaud boldness in our music school in Odessa Texas, we also encourage students to develop sensitivity both in music and interacting with others. Music, again, is highly useful in helping a student develop in these ways.
If you scored between 16 and 22 on the assessment it indicates that you generally have a confident and assertive interpersonal style. ou possess the ability to be flexible in difficult situations and balance your approach with those who tend to be more timid and those who tend to be more aggressive. Continue demonstrating an open and understanding attitude toward others. This “benefit of the doubt” mentality is often reciprocated and allows others to step in to help when things are not going well for you.
Learning to work well with others is accentuated and taught through musical interaction in groups and ensemble playing, which is why we emphasize these activities in our music school in Odessa Texas.